Wednesday, 10 April 2013

Ernie: Rock Bottom

Ernie smoothed out the bits of dust and gently swept them clear up the ledge. He looked to his right and did the same. He smudged his thumb on the arrange of concrete between his legs and picked it up slowly so that the particles clung to his skin. He blew a small wind out of his mouth and didnt vigil them flutter down.

The sky was dull, and to him there was a sharp short letter between its rich empty color and the imitation black of the skyscrapers windows in front of him merely 100 feet. To his left he saw the ledge and the blackness, and to his right the same. There were a some lonely lights in the building opposite him, and he could just barely make out one man at his desk, his head cradled in his hands. Ernie watched him for a while, just now he did non move. He raised a middle finger to the man, then(prenominal) let it drop freely in an arch concealment down to the ledge.

He shifted his eyes to the sky, and noticed that it was not impossible to expect the stars in the hectic city. He counted them closely, and in a some short seconds had picked out nine. The moon was mostly hidden by clouds, and it didnt give him much light. His thin concrete perch was well-lighted from behind by the security light of the elevator shaft.

He had told his old-timer earlier that day that he would be staying late to terminus up some long overdue work that had been bothering him. When his node put on a puzzled face, Ernie had motioned towards a people of papers on the edge of his desk.

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His boss had told him not to compress himself too much, but to finish...

a very good short story, it was detailed, but i deem you could have added a few much details, like how Ernie looks, and what color the pigeons eyes are, to add a more realistic feeling to it. but overall i think you did a large job, and i think you should make a part 2 unless you killed Ernie, cuz i dont kno if he fell or if he landed on the other side, u didnt very make that point clear, well ne ways great work!

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